A “cuckold” is a husband or male romantic partner who allows a third party into his marriage to sexually please his wife instead of him. However, within biology, it has come to mean a male who unwittingly invests himself in bringing up children that are not his own. The term comes from the bird “cuckoo,” which often kicks eggs from other birds out of their nests and replaces them with their own, allowing other birds to do all the work to bring up a baby bird they don’t realize isn’t their own. The term goes back to medieval times but has recently been shortened to “cuck.” Today the term cuck can be used descriptively within the community or as an insult. Urban Dictionary defines “Cuck” as “A man who lets his wife or girlfriend have sex with other men. Often the man lets her do whatever she wants and treats him like shit.”

In terms of cuckold fetishes, the man allowing their wife to be sexual with someone else often secretly enjoys the knowledge that his partner is sexually active on him with someone else (or at least is aware that the action is happening). Typically, this comes from a desire to feel humiliated and submissive within their own relationship but can always come from a level of masochism, too – the desire to inflict pain and discomfort upon themselves. While it may seem more evident for the partner who would be sexually active with others to bring up the fantasy, as they are the ones understood to gain the most enjoyment from the arrangement, the story typically lies directly in the mind of the person being cuckolded. They are understood to usually be the ones to suggest bringing the fantasy into fruition in the desire of humiliation. If cuckolding interests you, read Cuckolding: A Beginner’s Guide.


Cuckolding exists as a subtype of masochism; therefore, for all the reasons that people enjoy discomfort and pain, a cuckold may enjoy it too. It may also be that a cuck wants the eroticization of feeling like a failure and the bringing to life fantasies of not being enough and being humiliated. There is also a link to the biology of humans and their relationships that directly explains why a cuckold enjoys their humiliation fantasy of having their partner sleep with someone else. Cuckolding is a term that has been used within the public sphere ever since medieval times, if not before, and references can be found within Shakespeare’s plays too. This shows that it isn’t an underground term used only on chat forums but is generally understood. For many people, knowing that their partner is desired by others is a turn-on. Still, the desire to beat their adversaries’ sperm when impregnating their partner is often fundamental to a cuck. This is where the “hot wife” trope often comes into play, though this is only slightly related to cuckoldom, as this infers pride rather than a sense of humiliation, which cuckoldry is entirely based around.

In more modern times, there are a variety of ways that a cuckold can enjoy the humiliation of having their partner be sexually active with other people. Some who may not feel comfortable with having their partner sleep with others, or if the partner doesn’t wish to cheat, may instead enjoy hearing about their partner’s past sexual encounters, particularly those of great merit – potentially relating to a man having a bigger penis than them, being more attractive or wealthy than them, or beating them in some way when it comes to attractiveness and prowess. When their partner returns home, they can enjoy hearing in detail everything their partner got up to, getting off on the story and the humiliation and isolation it brings upon them. Some cucks may even send their partner off for the night, allowing them the freedom to sleep with or become sexual with whoever they want.

Polyamorous couples often describe on cuckold message boards a warm, fuzzy feeling they experience at seeing their partner be happy and sexual with other partners, a word that has come to be called “compersion.” While some may think this would be a similar experience for a cuckold, it’s important to remember that compersion invokes emotions in a way that being a cuckold doesn’t. Being a cuckold is more rooted in humiliation, particularly sexual humiliation and a lack of dignity.


While cuckolding can often be a respectful fetish between consenting adults, sometimes the idea can slip into offensive assumptions. It often utilizes the notion of “ownership” of one woman by a man to bring the greatest humiliation onto the cuckold. This can usually be translated into controlling and toxic behavior, as the shame often trespasses past just the lines of embarrassment by being cheated on into believing that having an adulterous partner damages a man’s soul or respectability. An example could be the simple framing of “my woman” used by a cuckold. This has only been inflated by the right-wing co-opting of the term “cuck” on online chat forums to mean a beta male who isn’t powerful enough to control their woman. These ideas of possession, ownership, and control are offensive and dangerous.


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